This was the start of my journey with Eating and Weight issues! My parents and maternal grandparents were extremely loving and supportive but my childhood was filled with staring, teasing, rejection and bullying. Already a shy child, this caused social anxiety.
I felt as though I lived most of my life with a lurking shadow – sometimes very pale and other times very dark and looming. I was always worried about my weight and how I looked, which caused me to constantly compare myself to others and feel as though I was never good enough. The lurking shadow was my Eating and Weight Disorders – Childhood Obesity, Anorexia, Bulimia, Binge Eating Disorder, Food Addiction and more. It made me HATE myself, SHAME myself, isolate myself and more.
My identity had become so ingrained with my body size, body shape, what I ate, what I didn’t eat, how much I exercised, my weight, my clothing size, and not feeling (eating it away). I knew there was more to me but I always felt like a failure and there was something wrong with me – I had tried every diet, self-help book, exercise program, pills, shakes etc. without success.
I finally realised the missing pieces of the puzzle and I began to re-create myself by doing things differently. Within 3 months I started to see some light and hope. Within 12 months I had lost my addictions and over 30kg! 6 years on, I have not fluctuated in weight and am free from all Eating and Weight Disorders after 34 years!